I've always enjoyed it. When I was a small child, I'd write on.... well, anything! If there was a pen, pencil, half a crayon, it didn't matter - anything to push and put words onto a piece of paper. And sometimes it wasn't even paper, it could be anything. I was a super hero with my powerful writing instrument and words that would cover a page. Putting all my hopes, fears, frustrations, poems, love notes, lyrics, and babble upon a page gave me "the power". Ahhhh, I am a super hero. My dad was consistently telling me "stop writing on things". Books, tables, myself. Didn't matter. "stop stop stop". I guess not only am I a super hero, I'm a rebel as clearly, I have not stopped writing.
There are mornings in the midst of my devotions I know exactly how I would like to share my thoughts. There are other days I feel rushed and struggle with putting my thoughts into words. This morning is a bit like that. I have a short window of opportunity to "babble" and share my "blessings". And where to begin.
I have often through my life been told, you should write a book. You should write cards, you should begin a blog. And although, flattering to hear. I had very little faith in myself. Really? I write like I think and I know if there is anyone on the planet who has an issue with communication and sharing accurately, it is I. My trying to communicate is sometimes like nailing Jell-o to the wall. But here I am. In my dining room, it is dark outside, the house is quiet and I am a SUPER HERO, my fingers pushing words upon a screen. Superhero in my own mind, as the only person who reads this blog right now is me. And from time to time my son. I've the best of intentions with this blog. My hope is that I will get to a place where I'm comfortable sharing and it will "take off". My thoughts in having a blog, as I've shared early on ... this is great therapy for me - Yes, I'm rather selfish! It is also an expression of my unshakeable faith. If someone stumbles upon my blog and reads only one brief "babble" or "blessing" and goes away smiling or encouraged ~ well then let my cape be pressed!
Yesterday I shared about the Loaves & Fishes. And the message giving something to God and asking Him to bless it. When He gives it back, accept it with a grateful heart and glorify Him in it. That is where I am with my blogging. I am prayerful over this blog. I have asked the Lord to use it for HIS PURPOSE not for mine. I've asked for HIS BLESSING. Every morning I seek HIS WORDS to be shared. I have been given a gift. The gift of a quiet morning, free therapy and a heart so abundantly full of God that I need an outlet to share. I trust when the words aren't there, God intercede and gives HIS WORDS. I've given my blog to God. I don't feel as of yet, that He has given it back to me. For now, I still feel that I am to be patient. To wait on Him. To trust His timing. To seek His words.
"We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps"
God is working on my blessing. I don't feel that He is finished with it yet. I trust that when I receive his anointing over my writing, I will know. He will reveal "the time is now". Until I feel that movement, I will sit quietly in my dining room, in my quiet house while the world begins to stir outside and I will seek His words. I will seek His will and I will prepare for His desires for my blog. Perhaps I never "go public". Maybe I have an online blog, that becomes more of a journal of sorts. More of a diary of my relationship with God. Whatever the journey, I know that I am meant to spend this time with God in the mornings listening to Him speak and waiting on His plan.